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View Full Version : Porsche Baiting to Lorry Dodging!


Bodybag
14-06-2006, 04:19 PM
Yesterday evening I came back from Bath to leicester and, as I was on beelzebub, decided to take the long way home. Ended up on the A34 for a bit and managed to bait a Porsche Carrera 4 into some slight shenanigans. :mand:

I think Beelzebub enjoyed it too as he didn't spit any oil at me when we pulled into the services at the M40/A43 junction.

This morning though, I endured the other end of driving stupidity when some fekkin tw4t in the third lane of the 4 lane stretch of M1 at Leicester decided he didn't want to queue to exit and stopped in the third lane to jump into a gap that wasn't there!!! i'd just pulled in from lane 4 to 3 and was doing my lifesaver, when I looked up there was a chuffing great arctic stopped in front of me. Thank god for Brembo's finest is all I can say. I had to swerve round to the left of the lorry to avoid door/face fusion only to find Mr Tw4t blocking the gap between the two lanes. He looked quite shocked when I started shouting at him as though he'd done nothing wrong!! C0ck!!!

As an aside to the first part of the story, Beelzebub now only reaches 138mph cos of the oversized rear cog, not the 144mph book speed he used to have. Obviously this was tested on a dyno and private road and not on the public highway!! :look:

Duncan
14-06-2006, 04:34 PM
Shame on you going so fast.

I usually use the Fosseway when going Bath to Leicester its much more fun than motorways and dual carriageways

Bodybag
14-06-2006, 05:13 PM
Which ones the Fosseway? I only ended up on the A34 cos I go across Wiltshire through Westbury and along the edge of Salisbury plain, through Bratton and Erlestoke through to Marlborough. Get on the M4 for a junction or two and then off at Junction 14 up to Wantage and then across to Oxford. gives me a good hour and a half of Windy B roads and fast flowing A roads. :mand:

Stafford
14-06-2006, 06:16 PM
Which ones the Fosseway?

The A429 that runs down through Stow on the Wold and Cirencester then just before Kemble get the A433 to Tetbury.
Watch out for the preverbial cameras though, had to drive up it from Bath today to Rugby, had to wear a suit so no bike.
I also work in Westbury, you must have ridden right past the office for your large tour.
Cheers
Q

Shandy
14-06-2006, 06:29 PM
Which ones the Fosseway? I only ended up on the A34 cos I go across Wiltshire through Westbury and along the edge of Salisbury plain, through Bratton and Erlestoke through to Marlborough. Get on the M4 for a junction or two and then off at Junction 14 up to Wantage and then across to Oxford. gives me a good hour and a half of Windy B roads and fast flowing A roads. :mand:

Or if not the fosseway (which i agree is a bloody nice road) to change things about don't get on the M4, carry straight on and pick up the A420 to Oxford a bit further down the road, another free flowing A road as long as you don't get stuck behind a tractor :mand:

PS: if you do go this way watch out for the odd speed camera or two along the way :toilet:

slob
14-06-2006, 07:11 PM
London to Mallory: Craigie and I went A41-Aylesbury, A413-Buckingham, A422-Banbury, A423-Coventry then A46/M69/A5 for the very last bit. Excellent way to avoid the M1.

Roberto
14-06-2006, 10:43 PM
porsche all the gear no idea.....

a boot in his precious door might of woken him up, not that i condone such behaviour.:twak:

bad-yeti
14-06-2006, 10:48 PM
porsche all the gear no idea.....

a boot in his precious door might of woken him up, not that i condone such behaviour.:twak:

Oi Nothing wrong with Porsche drivers.......very careful and decent people if you ask me. ;)

emily's driver
15-06-2006, 08:20 AM
He looked quite shocked when I started shouting at him as though he'd done nothing wrong!! C0ck!!!

I can sympathise with you as I had a recent run in (this morning's drive into work in fact, admittedly not on my bike) with a baffoon in a Volvo 4x4. Mobile chicane and driven by an amoeba (thought frankly that's an insult to single cell organisms). He decided to stop in the middle of the road having indicated to turn right. I passed his stationary car on the left and continued.

Seconds later he accelerates past me and cuts tight in front of my car then slams on the brakes eventually coming to a complete stop. I decide to reverse as in his obviously deranged state of mind, I coudn't be sure what he intended to do next. He then simply sped off and that was that.

I can only conclude that he was all or a combination of the following:

He was a total and utter twat
He had the mental acumen of a plant
He had an extremely small penis

I'm going out on a limb here and guessing he is all three.

markus
15-06-2006, 08:40 AM
As an aside to the first part of the story, Beelzebub now only reaches 138mph cos of the oversized rear cog, not the 144mph book speed he used to have. Obviously this was tested on a dyno and private road and not on the public highway!!

Of course it was and not dodging traffic on the m1 on sunday, whilst i was slowly following sulking about my brazen burnt red arms like a sissy girl....

Bodybag
16-06-2006, 08:04 PM
...No comment your honour!!