Just a thought.....

I wonder if the forum might call upon the services of two of its most valued members, Craigmac and Nik the Brief to offer motoring related legal advice to the forum . Perhaps Nik and Craig would be prepared to provide a pro bono service to the members [although personally I can`t stand U2]. I 'm sure that Nik is well qualified in this area and I know that Craig has done jam butty service in a previous life.
Perhaps I can start the ball rolling;
Normally when riding my bike I limit my drinking to 5 or 6 pints of 'driving' lager such as Carling or Fosters [unless its a Fridayof course]. What would happen if say, hypothetically, a mate confused the round and ended up buying you a few pints of full-fat Stella for you in error. Whilst you might wallow for a short while in the pecunary advantage you had gained , you might be smiling on the other side of your face as you blow into the policemans bag.
Would your mate's mistake stand up as a defence in court? Please advise.
Also,has anybody ever blown into a policemans bag and what does it taste like?

I have been brethalised twice, the police do not have bags, they have boxes. The boxes taste sterile and a bit like bazooka bubblegum. Both times i have had five pints of lager. On the first occasion it was castlemaine, second heineken (this was ten years ago long before heineken upped the ante from 3.5% to 5%)

Both times i was borderline and let go by the plod. I promptly visited both establishments that i had been drinking and questioned the landlords on whether they had been watering down their lager.

does anybody think i might have a case here?

Bob,
Why would you be asking advice from Nick the Brief....
Nick owns a chain shops selling ladies foundation wear, but started off the business with the basic knickers and a market stall!!
Hence the name "Nick the Brief"
Your mate is up a brown creek with no means of propulsion....He's looking at a stretch...up at the big house...Hey if you cant, do the time, dont do the crime....Dont drink and drive...clunk click every trip...
Id love to help...but this type of advice costs....Tell your mate to contact me with his bank details...


Dean a normal case consists of 24, unless its one of those Bargain ones containing only 20....which I think a very bad value for money...I always work it out on how much it is per litre...
Regards.

Originally Posted by dean

I have been brethalised twice, the police do not have bags, they have boxes. The boxes taste sterile and a bit like bazooka bubblegum. Both times i have had five pints of lager. On the first occasion it was castlemaine, second heineken (this was ten years ago long before heineken upped the ante from 3.5% to 5%)

Both times i was borderline and let go by the plod. I promptly visited both establishments that i had been drinking and questioned the landlords on whether they had been watering down their lager.

does anybody think i might have a case here?

Dean ,
I would think that you most definitely have a case for trading standards. I would be well pissed off if I had had half a gallon and didn`t test positive. Instead of hounding innocent bikers the police should spend their time cracking down on these rip-off landlords.
Interesting point you make about having to blow into the officer's box, presumably you must have been stopped by WPCs

Bob,
You used the term "Pro Bono"
We all know that Cher is an active biker, riding around the streets of Hollywood dressed in her leather chaps with her arse on display!
But the girls still greiving over the untimely demise of her ex husband and one time singing partner, Sonny.
Im certain that she frequents this board and im concerned that you might have offended her with your inference to wheather or not we are pro or anti Bono....The guy had a great career in stateside politics, cant we just leave it that...This is not a political forum.
Your ultra left wing veiws will not be tolerated here!!
Regards..

Bob - first things first, change your drinking habits. Lager is for girls. It’s the Perrier of the beer world, low priced fizzy water don’t touch the stuff. As for water I’d avoid that too as fish are known to fornicate in it. Guinness is the drink of choice for the educated driver since it’s known to be a ‘meal in itself’.

It is, of course, a well-established scientific fact that eating a heavy meal before or whilst drinking dramatically reduces the debilitating effects of alcohol on the human body. Drinking only Guinness which combines alcohol with food must therefore be totally harmless and have no effect whatsoever on your riding abilities. If you’re pulled by the fuzz blame any positive reading on the breathalyser on your chronic halitosis.

Craig – only very few people know that I am in ladies lingerie it’s very hard for the casual observer to notice when you’re wearing leathers. I’m pretty sure that they suspect it when I’m in a business suit though as apparently it’s de rigeur for most lawyers like the one I pretend to be…

As for pro bono work - I don't do anything if the only offer of remuneration is a couple of dog biscuits.

[QUOTE=nik_the_brief]Bob - first things first, change your drinking habits. Lager is for girls. It’s the Perrier of the beer world, low priced fizzy water don’t touch the stuff. As for water I’d avoid that too as fish are known to fornicate in it. Guinness is the drink of choice for the educated driver since it’s known to be a ‘meal in itself’.

Good advice Nik, gratefully recieved. However if I wanted a meal in a glass I`d put some fish and chips in a pint pot, or get a mug of Complan. The Guinness we get over here is faux Guinness because it has had all the goodness pastuerised out of it. Guinness in Dublin is unsullied by such processes and is full of health. It is indeed a meal in a glass, particulary if you`ve just vomited some soda bread and white pudding into it.
Would you and Craig kindly post your nightime contact numbers on the list? If I get a tug from the old bill over the weekend I need to know where I can get hold of you so you can post bail. I`m sure that kid won`t be able to keep his mouth shut............Can somebody tell when exactly does 'no' mean 'no' and not 'yes'? I get confused sometimes......

Originally Posted by CraigMac

Bob,
You used the term "Pro Bono"
We all know that Cher is an active biker, riding around the streets of Hollywood dressed in her leather chaps with her arse on display!
But the girls still greiving over the untimely demise of her ex husband and one time singing partner, Sonny.
Im certain that she frequents this board and im concerned that you might have offended her with your inference to wheather or not we are pro or anti Bono....The guy had a great career in stateside politics, cant we just leave it that...This is not a political forum.
Your ultra left wing veiws will not be tolerated here!!
Regards..

Did I say pro bono? I meant to say pro bonio [but Nik beat me to it], I am apolitical and therefore have no particular political axe to grind, particlarly with fascist, Thatcher-loving ex-filth. I am merely a dog food enthusiast and I bought the gun from Walmart.

i personally am neither pro or anti bono.

I do have an anti dorothy though. she's not political in the slightest, least not to my knowledge...

maybe i should post one of the spies on stakeout there for a few weeks just to make sure.