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He11cat
17-03-2011, 10:00 AM
From Thomas Cook Holidays - listing some of the guest's complaints during the season.

1. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."

2. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers to close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time - this should be banned

3. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food at all."

4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our swimming costumes and towels."

5. A tourist at a top African game lodge over looking a water hole, who spotted a visibly aroused elephant, complained that the sight of this rampant beast ruined his honeymoon by making him feel "inadequate".

6. A woman threatened to call police after claiming that she'd been locked in by staff. When in fact, she had mistaken the "do not disturb" sign on the back of the door as a warning to remain in the room.

7. "The beach was too sandy."

8. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as yellow but it was white."

9. A guest at a Novotel in Australia complained his soup was too thick and strong. He was inadvertently slurping the gravy at the time.

10. "Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women."

11. "We bought' Ray-Ban' sunglasses for five Euros from a street trader, only to find out they were fake."

12. "No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled."

13. "There was no egg slicer in the apartment..."

14.”We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish..."

15. "The roads were uneven.”

16. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England it only took the Americans three hours to get home."

17. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends' three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller."

18. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the accommodation’. We’re trainee hairdressers - will we be OK staying there?"

19. "There are too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners now live abroad'"

20. "We had to queue outside with no air conditioning."

21. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."

22. "I was bitten by a mosquito - no-one said they could bite."

23. "My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."


I don't think they should leave this Island :)

My fav is 23.... wow he was in for a treat on Birthdays and Xmas when he got married
and nobody told us there would be fish in the sea it startled the children! :spin:

JerryT
17-03-2011, 12:17 PM
You really do wonder don't you? There should be some sort of test before you are given a passport... :twak:

He11cat
17-03-2011, 12:21 PM
yup... but how jolly dare they not sell custard creams in the local shop !!

animaluk
17-03-2011, 12:30 PM
yup... but how jolly dare they not sell custard creams in the local shop !!

I thought you where more of a ginger nut girl :D

giler
17-03-2011, 01:03 PM
My favourite - "Too many foreigners now live abroad' :hail:

Dookbob
17-03-2011, 03:14 PM
I like Number 5, he would probably have felt more comfortable in the local flea market.

He11cat
17-03-2011, 05:08 PM
Oi animal you can't say that on here!!
It was a mistake!!!!
No I like custard creams !!!
Bet you like garybaldys :)

He11cat
17-03-2011, 05:10 PM
Mind you I'm a Sad case .. Johnny English here takes t bags!!!
I'm sorry that Lipton stuff is not real tea!!!

Jungle24
18-03-2011, 01:53 PM
I used to work in a travel agent and can believe all of these are true -

I had someone ask me if you had to be American to fly on American Airlines and also asked a lovely Irish chap if he had a clean license whilst booking him car hire to which he replied....of course I keep it in the plastic wallet the DVLA game me!!

The Yanks are even worse - I saw a guy speak into the grab handle on a double decker bus in London, you know the ones with a black ball on the end? Asking to get off at the next stop...when I asked him what he was doing he said isnt this a microphone to the driver!!

Pmsl!!

Capo
18-03-2011, 02:19 PM
Unfortunately, these people are also voters and most probably drivers and work for the HSE

He11cat
18-03-2011, 03:04 PM
True ... I had an American ask me to cook him some Brit food ... "hey you know ... That mole in the hole stuff???" I was a but baffled until eventually it was deduced he wanted Toad in the hole !! I had to live with that daily!!!! No wonder I'm not right in the head!

Grumpy
18-03-2011, 06:05 PM
When ever I've come across Americans on holiday in Europe I can't help but laugh. My favorite is if you start talking to them, say when your in Austria somewhere, they look at you like a rabbit in headlights because they are so surprised you not only speak English fluently,but you understand everything they've said!!

jerry
18-03-2011, 06:33 PM
What does USA mean????



Unlimited Supply of Arseholes !!!!!!!!!!!

He11cat
18-03-2011, 11:10 PM
lol :) I swear being married to a yank affected me for life ... it was like a life prison sentence in hell.
I admit I am not catch of the day or a good wife material but hey I tried once!

They do not understand irony .. sarcasm or anything funny at all, you can be sarcastic all day long and take the **** he didn't even suss thats what you where doing!

.... after 3 months the accent grated on me as did the constant whining.. ... seeing where he is 20 years on dam it I could have been riding in the back of a pick up with a gun and a checked shirt in hicksville... probably with an iffy perm and partaking in line dancing.
I am so glad I escaped!

Funniest thing though is when they make out they understand Monty Pythons flying circus and try and laugh at it... trust me they don't ... and it didn't fool me!!

jerry
20-03-2011, 12:53 PM
Too many morons in the world ....they even get to vote for the psychopaths who rule us !!!!!!!we are totally f%*ked!!!!!!

He11cat
20-03-2011, 04:39 PM
Agree....
Tell you what those dam moles where a bugger to catch and the state of my lawn