the JCB song

[dean]

just heard this tonight, perhaps this is a nice song for sons, for fathers, for didge.

http://www.jcbsong.co.uk/jcbvideo.asp


night folks

[jill]

Ahh, that is the cutest animation. I have a special link to this song, my initials are JCB. Yes, I think my Dad thought it was hilarious.

I've sent it to my Dad...

Cheers
Jill aka JCB

[madhatter]

just heard this tonight, perhaps this is a nice song for sons, for fathers, for didge. http://www.jcbsong.co.uk/jcbvideo.asp
night folks

Gives all us Dad's that nice warm Father & Son feeling!!! :) :)

[A Yerbury]

curse those pesky web design kids and their hoxton ways! the scamps have stolen the style from my signature....Dean how is your wifey? My neighbour has gone down this route and from the lounge I can access his wifey! tee hee etc.

[dean]

Alex, i am not sure am clear on your message here. this thread is strictly group hug, dont try and bring your subversions here, you schock merchant you.

p.s. i was a leetle bit drunk when i heard that song, got my kids out of bed, just to breathe on them, a smell that i am sure will linger in their memories for decades (not really, wifey wouldnt let me)

apologies for the syrup.

[A Yerbury]

wifeys world? I was going to go to pc world? judging by the comercials they seem very helpful.

group hugs all round though!
Alex.

[Nonnie]

I bought the album.

Reminds me of trips with my dad. He drives a JCB you know. He will love it for Christmas. Thanks dean.

Top marks for the animation. Superb. Particularly enjoyed the lines at the end.

[Scotty]

guess what i just heard on t'old radio 1

the 'power' o't t'internet eh

[dean]

guess what i just heard on told radio 1

the 'power' of the internet eh

being released as a single on the 12th of dec

xmas no 1?, gotta be worth a bet.

[A Yerbury]

sorry, I'm doing a pd on this one, mawkish sub Billy Brag/half man half biscuit tosh for a nostalgic slice of the early 80's, as bad as the nostalgia for spangles/parkers/space hoppers from the 70's! Plus my Dad was a language prof and the A team was frowned upon in our household....IMO I like the website though so I am not a comperrrrlete humbug!

seasons xxxx's

[jill]

A couple of weeks ago it was 'ROTW' (record of the week) on XFM - the drivetime dj is now Lucio who is a knob admittedly, but the music's good.

XFM for those of you who like new music - and Mr Y, all music is recycled to some extent and having heard an interview with the fellas, this is actually about his experience of riding with his roadbuilder Dad when he was 5, we can't all have English Professors for fathers :) - is 104.9FM is has a Manchester version and you can get it on satellite. Website: xfm.co.uk.

Anything with real musicians - Nizlopi have been around for years playing the festivals etc - is better than anything by most things played on Radio1.

Live in the now...

[dean]

c'mon alex, get that space hopper out of the closet,wrap up in your warmest parker with a pack of spangles in the arm pocket, and boogie!

on a serious note, my father was a biker, hence my belief in a love for bikes being somewhat hereditary. If your father was a swot Alex, was he a bike riding swot? if not, where did you get your love for bikes?, cos bikes are a boys (and girls as well) toy. which is sort of what the jcb song is about, ish.

[A Yerbury]

calm down "the kids" I just don't like this song?!? it sounds exactly like a very (not new music) tune by half man half biscuit from about oohh..15 years ago? and as much as I like dear BillY Bragg (Wilco collabarations, right on leftie etc etc) he has an horrendous voice darlings...I can just see the dancefloor now, this song will be the beery bond! last song of the night at the student union, oohh how we all loved the A team! gizza kiss mate! I love my dad etc! then they will all dance in an exciteable unsexy white boy no rythm manner as the tempo increases. no thanks! however I will defend to the death peoples right to nip down to woolies and buy this slammin piece of vinyl!

Fluff.x

ps.Language Proffesors are ECM freaks so I am no doubt a jazz snob, oh dear!!

[Banshee]

I had a Texan choc bar today.. Dunno if it had been on the shelf 30 yrs but it was a mighty chew..........i'll get my coat.. never had a dad but one with a JCB would have been cool.. As a dad i did go and wake my son up the other week to watch South Park... Bad dad.. I like the song.

[A Yerbury]

oh well if bambino likes it it must be good, I take it all back in the interests of world peace! Nizlopi for number 1 christmas song! where did you get the texan from? lucky sod.
Alex.
ps.Big up the jcb song as Dean might say!

[dean]

william hill have given 14/1 odds on jcb song for xmas no1

[A Yerbury]

don't rule out sir cliff, always worth a flutter. oh, Rip georgie porgy, apparently a genius although he has yet to publish any work on superstring theory.

Love.
Alex.

[CraigMac]

this was an "Earthmoving" moment when I heard this song..I really "Dig" it...........ha...ha..haha...ha..


I apologise wholeheartedly...

[Little Monster]

as bad as the nostalgia for spangles/parkers/space hoppers from the 70's!

How could anyone not love space hoppers???? Mine was super fast and bouncy. Woo hooooooo.

Thought the song/animation was cute for one listen but I'm fairly sure I'm going to hear it everywhere now, shops, mobile phones etc and will want to smash up jcbs by mid December.

[Didge]

Well, I just watched / listened to that, and have to say that it's typical of the trite sh*te that one expects in todays dumbed-down music world.
It's CRAP people.....utter CRAP!

[Scotty]

How could anyone not love space hoppers???? Mine was super fast and bouncy. Woo hooooooo.



im sure it has everything to do with rider 'weight' ,hopper pressure,and the ambient lighting conditions :confused:

[A Yerbury]

A couple of weeks ago it was 'ROTW' (record of the week) on XFM - the drivetime dj is now Lucio who is a knob admittedly, but the music's good.

XFM for those of you who like new music - and Mr Y, all music is recycled to some extent and having heard an interview with the fellas, this is actually about his experience of riding with his roadbuilder Dad when he was 5, we can't all have English Professors for fathers :) - is 104.9FM is has a Manchester version and you can get it on satellite. Website: xfm.co.uk.

Anything with real musicians - Nizlopi have been around for years playing the festivals etc - is better than anything by most things played on Radio1.

Live in the now...

Ms Jill, no longer listening to xfm on t'radio as no longer in London but having listened to the daytime show on line for the past few days I can confirm that the xfm/radio 1 playlists are near identicle...Kaisers, Libertines, Babyshambles, gorillaz, sigur ros, arctic monkeys, white stripes, hard fi, athlete, killers, foo fighters, strokes, Bravery etc etc all good stuff of course but real ponces listen to resonace fm (or late junction on radio 3!) I just can not stand inane adverts every 5 minutes. Of course all music is recycled?! personally I think that the hives outdo the stooges for example, however the nizlopi fellow sounds too much like Billy B IMO.

Yours living in the now but would rather be in the future with hovercars etc.
Alex.

Ps.nice view of Fuji BTW, I hope we can still be friends as I have a soft spot for girls called Jill.
pps.That west country DJ (JLC?) is less funny than he was on stricly come dancing and he was not very funny on that.
ppps.currently Magic numbers! it really is a carbon copy of the current chart on radi0 1, maybe late night they get a bit less predictable, I'll give it a whirl.

[Paranoid Dave]

space hopper speed???

Surely thats like a bicycle that wont keep upright? All to do with the idiot piloting the hopper. I never had one as a kid and feel i was deprived some serious fun.

[A Yerbury]

space hopper speed???

Surely thats like a bicycle that wont keep upright? All to do with the idiot piloting the hopper. I never had one as a kid and feel i was deprived some serious fun.

they never worked back in the days, something to do with the hopper being made of industrial strength 1970's rubber...ie, heavier than the skinny 8 year old sat upon it...I sort of dragged mine about under me...-it was quite hard work. I believe the newer models no longer suffer from this? you were not deprived, well you probably were but not in the bouncing dept, you really missed nothing.

Alex.

ps.I like you never had a bmx so I feel yr pain David.....My cousin with his American dad had a mongoose, jammy bugger.

[Paranoid Dave]

you were not deprived, well you probably were but not in the bouncing dept

No I've been deprived of that ever since ;)

ps. As for the BMX i never had one of those either.
pps. thanks for easing my mind of hopper worries
ppps. why do you use so many ps's
pppps. its really annoying
ppppps. please stop.

[A Yerbury]

ps.you are really annoying.
pps.please don't stop.
ppps.why do you pretend to be a sad c~~t when you are in fact a nice and clever chap?? strange????
pppps. etc...
ppppps.you did have one of those raleigh things though...

[Paranoid Dave]

huh?

i don't pretend to be a happy chappy or a miserable C, i'm just me being me which is more than a lot of people on here who seem to have an on line identity.

I had a tomohawk not a chopper, poor relative of the chopper really, no gears.
ps its still annoying.

[A Yerbury]

in that case why not make an insy winsy teeny weeny effort to change yourself? I wouldn't want you to get all :bunny: :burnout: :bunny: :lol: on us but if you conduct yourself with as little flair, wit, charm and good humour in the real world as you do in the virtual one then it's no wonder your little corner of the petri dish sounds so depressing? just a thought!
Alex.x
ps. hey I'm "just being me etc" :D

[Paranoid Dave]

:bunny: :D :bunny:
must try harder

[Little Monster]

[QUOTE=A Yerbury]they never worked back in the days, something to do with the hopper being made of industrial strength 1970's rubber...ie, heavier than the skinny 8 year old sat upon it...I sort of dragged mine about under me...-it was quite hard work. I believe the newer models no longer suffer from this? you were not deprived, well you probably were but not in the bouncing dept, you really missed nothing.
QUOTE]

I think by the time I got to using the space hopper circa 1980 my 3 older siblings had bounced the hell out of it so it had uber bounce capabilities. It was thinner/lighter than my pal's hoppers though so perhaps it was an expensive import or something. x

ps - PD - maybe someone will get you one for christmas?
pps - what's all this about on-line personalities?

[jill]

Mr Y
I shall check out Resonance FM. I am definitely the 'I love more obscure music than you' type of person, so maybe we have a natural affinity. Paradise FM on iTunes is also very good - it generally sounds like they stole my record collection. (A lot of 4AD bands, Dinosaur Jr, early Lemonheads and American Music Club.)

I have to say I think the Stooges are overrated, as are Pink Floyd (my personal abhorrence for them knows no bounds) and Jane's Addiction. I never liked Billy Bragg and I don't agree that Nizlopi sounds like him - we shall have to agree to disagree on that one.

Indeed, if the West Country DJ on XFM says 'good times' one more time, I will personally go up to Leicester Square and punch him. Unfortunately most DJs on XFM are exceedingly crap. I like radio adverts though (I'm a Marketeer, not as good as a Rocketeer, but it's still fun), they're often quite amusing.

Yours tuning in to resonancefm, wearing black, shades and reading Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance... :cool:

Jill
PS Yes, I like the Hokusai too - I think I owe him a lot in royalties.
PPS Damn I wasn't going to do a PS as it might wind up PD. Sorry PD!

[A Yerbury]

my sister has that hokusai on her ankle so is racking up the royalties! there was a time when resonance was so cool it hurt...it was a bit much tbh, a lot of warp white noise stuff and wire readers, it is different though. I also work in marketing? we should form some crime bustin duo someday? just a thought. Janes Addiction were fab mr tracy, but everything else...loolapalooza, the film that never happened, porno for pyros, the comeback were all pretty dire. Yes Pink Floyd is for dullards (and monster owners it seems??!!)

Alex.x

ps.edited due to spelling woes.
pps.the pps is to annoy our very own little dictator. bless.

[jill]

Heavens-a-betsy, you win! Art radio? I've just had a listen and it sounds like in installation at Tate Britain. No wonder you thought the JCB song was mawkish and derivative!

(Yes, lets market stuff...our name: 'BY'. Barringer & Yerbury. Marketing By. Oh ho ho.)

Actually I guessed you worked in marketing, you said you had a Mac, you've got a goatee, and you're on here all the time.

And back to the group effort, I had a second-hand Chopper, with a white vinyl seat and a tassles hanging off the handle bars. Hard and tiring to ride, looked great - a bit like my CBR!

jcb

[CraigMac]

Jill and Alex..

Ive done a bit of car booting, but its not the real stuff like you two do. So what do you flog, fruit and veg or crockery?
I think that marketing lark is a real art form, do you do all that "Speeling"?

Mind you its a bit chilly at this time of year, wrap up well!!

Regards

[A Yerbury]

Jill and Alex..

Ive done a bit of car booting, but its not the real stuff like you two do. So what do you flog, fruit and veg or crockery?
I think that marketing lark is a real art form, do you do all that "Speeling"?

Mind you its a bit chilly at this time of year, wrap up well!!

Regards

It gets worse Jill I am a photographer for a PR firm so not quite marketing although we do a bit.....please tick all the ponce boxes, I have just had a green tea for goodness sake. sake would be my preffered tipple though.

Alex.

ps.Craig I am trying to "pull the birds" please stop interupting.
pps.marketing by? good luck! we all like a bit of girl on girl but touching mens willys is a no no (IMO)

[jill]

Hi CraigMac

Yeah, I didn't know what I wanted to do when I left school. I just wanted a job in which I could earn a lot for doing nowt which was lots of fun and included lots of 'jollies'. It's great!

Funnily enough, on the odd occasion I've done a boot sale, I've outsold and out-profiteered everyone. I can flog ANYTHING - but during the day, software...

It's all about the customer; genuinely, I love you guys...

jill

[dean]

(Yes, lets market stuff...our name: 'BY'. Barringer & Yerbury. Marketing By. Oh ho ho.)jcb

How about Berbury?, sounds original to me.

i can be bribed to leave the room with a cadburys cream egg by the way.

[jill]

How about Berbury?, sounds original to me.

i can be bribed to leave the room with a cadburys cream egg by the way.


Very good Dean! :D I'm in Essex, so it has even better resonance (fm). So we've got a name and a form of tartan...anyone for a catchphrase?

(Surely, seeing Cadbury's Cream Eggs now, would be like seeing Christmas lights in October?)

[dean]

as i am sure alex and Craig will attest, i am a spy, mostly undercover work, stakeouts, bin rummaging and the like. I cant really say too much about it for security reasons. social security reasons.

On a non surveillance note, i can remember the heady days of Xfm's first transmissions, well before the days when they were consumed by crap-it-all FM.

They had a trial broadcast of a month(october 96 or 97?, cant remember exactly) and they had something to prove, excellent stuff. They then got their license approved and went live. I can also remember when Ricky Gervaise used to do the sunday afternoon show, he went through a phase of ringing up his mum every week, she should have been a character on the office.

i am afraid GLR was my favorite though (i believe it is now london live or some such poncy name.)

[jill]

A few weeks ago I was clearing out some paperwork and I found a flyer from XFM when it was a pirate station and allied to The Cure. I went to A LOT of gigs at that time.

The only sticker I allowed in my Beetle's window was for XFM, as you say, before it sold out.

Dean you might remember then. Who was the morning DJ before Christian O'Connell - the one that suddenly disappeared. I never found out why he was thrown out and I can't remember his name.

So we're all aging indie kids together then? Super.

[A Yerbury]

as i am sure alex and Craig will attest, i am a spy, mostly undercover work, stakeouts, bin rummaging and the like. I cant really say too much about it for security reasons. social security reasons.

On a non surveillance note, i can remember the heady days of Xfm's first transmissions, well before the days when they were consumed by crap-it-all FM.

They had a trial broadcast of a month(october 96 or 97?, cant remember exactly) and they had something to prove, excellent stuff. They then got their license approved and went live. I can also remember when Ricky Gervaise used to do the sunday afternoon show, he went through a phase of ringing up his mum every week, she should have been a character on the office.

i am afraid GLR was my favorite though (i believe it is now london live or some such poncy name.)

I agree! they did get mainstream about that time, just constant slipknot etc...GLR was and is a good station. That Robert Elms, what a cheeky chappie! he just loves being in London.

Alex.

ps.I have just indulged in a rebranding exercise, from now on A Yerbury will be @yerbury, in a pastel shade naturally. I will be invoicing myself for some millions presently.

pps.It's true, Dean is a spy ...as are his kids, he calls them his spy kids (just don't mention luke) all very hush hush.

[CraigMac]

Dean,
Alex is doing a fine job of chatting up the lovely Jill and we are acting like the two drunken mates, who have stumbled into the room, when he was in full flow....Let the dog see the rabbit....

Alex, if you need any "Chat up lines" give us the nod!!

Ahem..!!

[A Yerbury]

Dean,
Alex is doing a fine job of chatting up the lovely Jill and we are acting like the two drunken mates, who have stumbled into the room, when he was in full flow....Let the dog see the rabbit....

Alex, if you need any "Chat up lines" give us the nod!!

Ahem..!!

I thought I was in there!! but now she's talking to Dean a bit too much?!! yeah, he is using the old 007 routine again........

concerned.
Alex.

ps.what is this dog and rabbit thing? is it a bit like pickles and beaver?

[dean]

Jill, Craig's right, we have no place here, it's just best that me and craig stagger off in to the fog looking for a warm bosom and after hours drinking.

however, afore we go no more a'rovin, here's a link to some xfm stuff.

http://www.transdiffusion.org/rmc/commercial/xfm.asp

[jill]

Yes please, give me your best chat up lines. They're always very telling.

Also, my head is very easily turned by a truck load of BHP. I like bikes a lot, but I love cars too.

What's your best chat up line - one each...

EDIT: Thanks for the link Dean. I now realise I've got MOR in my old age - that article is quite right. I shall now scan the dial for some illicit stations...Ilford posse here I come.

[CraigMac]

Jill,
What a great catch you have there with Alex, its fantastic that love can blossom through that great medium of the internetwebthing....

Is this the first ukmoc wedding?

Im glad I played a small part in bringing you two together, good luck for the future and hey... remember, if your thinking of having kids and its a boy......

Regards

[dean]

I once said to a girl "you've got lovely eyes, i could live in your eyes"

she said, "you'd be at home, theres a sty in one of them"

so as a result, i tend to go down the rohypnol route these days.(is that a bit close to the bone?")

[CraigMac]

Jill,...That was my mothers name....

(That wasn't very good was it....Ohh, theres another one....)

Jill......Did it hurt.....when you fell from heaven??

Im getting the hang of this.....

[A Yerbury]

I saw a car the other day, it was a bluey grey colour I think.

Alex.x

[A Yerbury]

I once said to a girl "you've got lovely eyes, i could live in your eyes"

she said, "you'd be at home, theres a sty in one of them"

so as a result, i tend to go down the rohypnol route these days.(is that a bit close to the bone?")

he said close to the bone!!

[jill]

Ah, Cilla, I'm going to pick number 1.

Now who's going to be more disappointed when the screen slides back?

[A Yerbury]

I have decided to woo Jill with words! -they love this apparently? so far I jave the words Jill, thrill, skill, pill and kill...I just need to jumble the words a bit? this poetry lark is quite easy really. I don't know about bhp as a turn on but I do like women with £££ and young Jill sounds like she's minted! result! C'mon honey, lets make sweet (indie) music.

Yours till the end of time etc etc.

Alex.xxx

[CraigMac]

Alex,
Ive thought of a few more words..hill...shrill...trill (as in bird seed, but that one might be a bit hard to fit into your poem, but then again, birds...not budgies....love a man with a sense of humour.....)

Regards....lovesonnetsRus

[dean]

how about pill?

you cant have a romantic poem without the word pill in it.

and maybe till.

kerching.

[CraigMac]

Alex,
You mentioned food before, are you thinking of cooking a romantic meal for Jill and then reading out your/our love poem?

I wouldn't go for that Mangy trout that you mentioned earlier, fish goes off quite easily...Why not go for champagne and oysters...Ive heard that they are a bit of an afrohaircut...and should get her in the mood for love ....if you get my drift....

Regards

[jill]

Is this the sort of mangy trout to which you were referring?

[dean]

merely a suggestion.

[A Yerbury]

cooking a meal? this is all starting to sound like hard work for one man?! maybe all three of us can "go out with" Jill? that way one of us does the cooking, another the poetry and one lucky caller gets to do the hand holding thing? just an idea.

Alex.x

[CraigMac]

Manage a trout +1

Alex, The three off us going out with one bird...sorry lady...will just end up in a big scrap....

I saw a film with three fella's and one woman, but thats another story...(It was a bit rude)

Regards

[dean]

maybe we can, as alex inferred, take turns?

sounds far more amicable and less of a squash.

how does that sound jill?

[jill]

Yeah, it's all been very pleasant daydreaming but I would hazard a guess that my boyfriend wouldn't be too over the moon.

I'm sure he wouldn't mind the help though. I wouldn't be surprised is the words 'high' and 'maintenance' I've overheard weren't to do with the Monster.

Maybe you three boys could get together anyway...again, that's another film.

[A Yerbury]

maybe we can, as alex inferred, take turns?

sounds far more amicable and less of a squash.

how does that sound jill?

I'm cool with that -if craig kicks off we could always subdue him with Deans ropeyknoll stuff?

[A Yerbury]

Yeah, it's all been very pleasant daydreaming but I would hazard a guess that my boyfriend wouldn't be too over the moon.

I'm sure he wouldn't mind the help though. I wouldn't be surprised is the words 'high' and 'maintenance' I've overheard weren't to do with the Monster.

Maybe you three boys could get together anyway...again, that's another film.

I'm cool with that -if craig kicks off we could always subdue him with Deans ropeyknoll stuff?

Alex.

ps.I did get some good work done today despite these distractions (I have a lovely assistant)

[CraigMac]

Jill,
Please dont tell your boyfreind that we've been chatting you up.....Ive seen some of these guys on the market stalls and some of them are quite hard....

Do you sell fish?

Regards

[jill]

I'm sure he won't mind, he's an absolute kitten.

For instance, his nicknames are at rugby, Psycho, at work silverback (like the gorilla).

EDIT: Going home now to do yoga. See, I'm more poncey than Alex!

[dean]

[QUOTE=jill]I'm sure he won't mind, he's an absolute kitten.

For instance, his nicknames are at rugby, Psycho, at work silverback (like the gorilla).QUOTE]

how to clear a thread with one post.

[jill]

Sorts the men from the boys!

[CraigMac]

I'm sure he won't mind, he's an absolute kitten.

For instance, his nicknames are at rugby, Psycho, at work silverback (like the gorilla).

EDIT: Going home now to do yoga. See, I'm more poncey than Alex!

Jill, Ive seen a few things in the paper recently about schoolboys going out with older women. You say he goes to Rugby, is he mates with Tom Brown and that fella called Flashman....

Just a thought...

[nik_the_brief]

I'm sure he won't mind, he's an absolute kitten.

For instance, his nicknames are at rugby, Psycho, at work silverback (like the gorilla).

EDIT: Going home now to do yoga. See, I'm more poncey than Alex!

I'm poncier than the both of ya, I had green tea this morning a la Alex and do yoga too (not whilst drinking the tea that would be stupid and dangerous). We all know that boys doing yoga is poncier by far. Oh yeah, and I have a personal trainer too... well temporarily anyway.

[A Yerbury]

Tish and pish, psycho? silverback? so what does this tell us? the fellow has hairy shoulders and dresses up in his grandmothers clothing, big deal (we all do it) a little less of this lilly livered acquiescent chat please boys.

I do pilates.
Alex.

ps.I don't really but my friend does.

[A Yerbury]

ps.rugby is really not cool (you know this)

I must away to drink poncy booze!
AY.

[steviej]

.............I had green tea this morning a la Alex..................

Nowt wrong with green tea................................


..................tastes even better sans lait :eek:

[A Yerbury]

have you be at mothers cooking sherry again Bernard?

[nik_the_brief]

Nowt wrong with green tea................................


..................tastes even better sans lait :eek:

heaven forfend that anyone would even contemplate the addition of cow juice to green tea!

On a similar tangent I find that Innocenti smoothie stuff (although extortionately expensive) is delicious. My serving suggestion involves a healthy slosh of Absolut though, gives it a bit of a kick...

[jill]

I'm sorry Alex, we will have to disagree yet again.

Although I would not say that rugby is 'cool' (I'm so cool it doesn't matter), it is certainly quite cool to watch a bunch of manly men in tight shorts wrestle each other in mud. I would certainly expect fellas to, conversely, enjoy watching girly girls in tight shorts wrestling each other in mud. No?

I think Nik is ahead in the poncey stakes. Boys doing yoga is far poncier than pilates. And he drinks green tea.

[A Yerbury]

oh no, mud wrestling is redneck territory, I would rather watch latex vixens number 5. Absolut is no longer cool Nik, you should be drinking the Polish stuff with plants in for ponce points.

A.x

[nik_the_brief]

My uncle used to do all the BBC rugby commentary and was a well known scrum half for a number of years when I was a youf. He also presented Rugby Special on the beeb for a while. Before that he played for a number of probably unheard of clubs, the Harlequins and England were a couple I remember the names of.

Subsequently I have never played the game or had any real interest in doing so coz my relatively famous (in rugby circles) surname meant that I was always ploughed into the ground before I got anywhere as a lad at school. Talk about good aversion therapy!

[dean]

My uncle used to do all the BBC rugby commentary and was a well known scrum half for a number of years when I was a youf. He also presented Rugby Special on the beeb for a while. Before that he played for a number of probably unheard of clubs, the Harlequins and England were a couple I remember the names of.

Subsequently I have never played the game or had any real interest in doing so coz my relatively famous (in rugby circles) surname meant that I was always ploughed into the ground before I got anywhere as a lad at school. Talk about good aversion therapy!

well, go on then Nik, dont keep us all in suspenders, come out from behind that screen.

(an added bonus of this celebrity status is that jill might fancy you, i think she's gone off alex due to his tea remarks)

[A Yerbury]

I have always fancied beefy nik, now even more so.
Alex.

ps.I think Jill has gone of me as I don't think I was being a bastard enough?

[nik_the_brief]

well, go on then Nik, dont keep us all in suspenders, come out from behind that screen.

(an added bonus of this celebrity status is that jill might fancy you, i think she's gone off alex due to his tea remarks)

Guess - go on you know you want to!

It's not Bill Mclaren so it must be the other one.

What a bonus we could practice our asanas together...

[nik_the_brief]

I have always fancied beefy nik, now even more so.
Alex.

ps.I think Jill has gone of me as I don't think I was being a bastard enough?

I'm not surprised Alex, I bring out the curiousity in many red-blooded young men. Last time I was in Tunis I got my arris felt up but that's another story. You're pretty gorgeous yourself darlin' - it's the cocquettishly raised (and immaculately groomed) eyebrow that does it for me...

ps - Don't fret Jill's just playing hard to get. You know she can't resist your manly charms. Failing that try following Deans rohypnol route, a sure-fire winner (if ya like 'em dribbling and unconscious!)

[jill]

Yes, Nik and I 'googled' Alex Yerbury for images and a few of them are of dubious manliness. ('Though very creative, so I'm still suitably impressed.)

Come on, I'm crap at remembering names. Who's your famous rugger-relative? (My hugely tenuous link to an actual player: My Mum's schoolfriend Val's daughter is married to Ben Cohen's cousin. I know. It's amazing.)

What's your favourite asana?

And it's not true Alex, intelligent women don't like bastards.

[A Yerbury]

........ starmer-smith, making his day-boo for England.

[nik_the_brief]

Famous rugger relly is Nigel Starmer-Smith. It always goes down well when I'm appearing in court as most judges seem to have at least a passing interest in the sport (pardon the pun).

Favourite asana - I only know the english terms as I'm not that poncy but ya can't beat the corpse pose. I do however like to spend an inordinate amount of time standing on my head and shoulder standing so I s'pose it must be the inverted poses really. Don't really have a specific favourite.

Favourite Osama - well it's not Bin Laden.

Sadly Jill - my experience is that some (otherwise) intelligent women do like bastards. Fortunately that's not the majority who prefer the sensitive sort like myself (or silverback gorilla types!)

[nik_the_brief]

Damn - beaten to my own answer! I have previously posted up my full poncey name here though (Nicholas Matthew Harry Starmer-Smith) so no real surprise.

Other uncle is a famous (in military circles) military man with an OBE so it's only my dad who missed out on fame and fortune.

My cousin - Nigel's son Charlie is a journo who writes for the Telegraph so the name gets about a bit. It's only me who's only famous in his own mind.

[A Yerbury]

Dean you seem to know about this (and lots of other things!) is Nik "bigging himself up" ???

curiously yours.
Alex.

ps.Famous link..the fellow with the afro in the pictures is a friend who occasionally goes by the moniker pizzaman, album written by Norman Cook and a "hit smash" single called happiness, he is a bluddy nice bloke, like Charlie stamer smith probably?

[nik_the_brief]

Ooh if only I could.

I believe you can get a cream for that sort of thing but I can't afford to try it.

Sadly I really do have a poncy family and it's just me and my brothers who are the proverbial dark coloured ovine creatures.

We're the sort of dumbed down version of the others, definitely the poor relations. And proud of it - in a masochistic, self-flagellatory kind of way.

ps - Happiness - not a cover of that famous Ken Dodd song that Dean's always banging on about by any chance? I posted a thread about it once. the song went something along the lines of "A penis, a penis, the greatest gift that I possess..."

[CraigMac]

Nik, Im the Doddy aficianado.....

Dean is more of a Tom Jones man, i think you will find.....

[jill]

Ooo, a Starmer-Smith. Get you?! I'm not related to anyone famous, I've just met a few. Mostly in film and opera (I used to be fortunate and work in poncey circles in London, now I work in Basildon :( ).

Yes the corpse is my favourite too. I think more people would do yoga if they realised a lot of it is to do with lying down. Is it lying or laying?

As you probably guessed, I believe that if a woman is intelligent, she doesn't put up with any nonsense. Women who say they like 'bastards' are lacking in self-esteem and aren't worth a punt anyway.

[SAMMYE]

As you probably guessed, I believe that if a woman is intelligent, she doesn't put up with any nonsense. Women who say they like 'bastards' are lacking in self-esteem and aren't worth a punt anyway.

ha ha you love it really!!!

[nik_the_brief]

Nik, Im the Doddy aficianado.....

Dean is more of a Tom Jones man, i think you will find.....

Wrong nutter - sorry Craig - no offence intended matey!!

[A Yerbury]

I will occasionally do a corpse, there is the other position where you stand against a wall? thats good, it is all about the breathing apparently. Tap dancing thats the new thing, trust me.

Alex "silver toes" Yerbury

[nik_the_brief]

Ooo, a Starmer-Smith. Get you?! I'm not related to anyone famous, I've just met a few. Mostly in film and opera (I used to be fortunate and work in poncey circles in London, now I work in Basildon :( ).

Yes the corpse is my favourite too. I think more people would do yoga if they realised a lot of it is to do with lying down. Is it lying or laying?

As you probably guessed, I believe that if a woman is intelligent, she doesn't put up with any nonsense. Women who say they like 'bastards' are lacking in self-esteem and aren't worth a punt anyway.

I didn't realise how hard it is to lie down (note I skillfully avoided the lying/laying argument there coz I'm not sure) until I took up yoga though. Corpse pose can be quite a challenge in some ways. Never taken yoga seriously enough to start eating properly or pouring salt water up my nose, giving up the booze or owt though...

I must confess to preferring women who enjoy a bit of nonsense every now and again though. As long as it's consensual nonsence and all that.

Alex - standing against the wall is when the police are taking very unflattering portrait shots isn't it? You know - that wall with the lines and height chart behind you. We've all been there (or not lived eh!!). Didn't know it was a yoga thing too.

[A Yerbury]

I didn't realise how hard it is to lie down (note I skillfully avoided the lying/laying argument there coz I'm not sure) until I took up yoga though. Corpse pose can be quite a challenge in some ways. Never taken yoga seriously enough to start eating properly or pouring salt water up my nose, giving up the booze or owt though...

I must confess to preferring women who enjoy a bit of nonsense every now and again though. As long as it's consensual nonsence and all that.

Alex - standing against the wall is when the police are taking very unflattering portrait shots isn't it? You know - that wall with the lines and height chart behind you. We've all been there (or not lived eh!!). Didn't know it was a yoga thing too.

against the wall? I have been sat down on all.....3 occasions? when entering prison there is also the "touching toes" exercise, nonsense, but not as nice as the nonsense you allude to (I hope)

Alex.

ps.I can vouche for Niks wife's partiallity in the nonsense dept.

[CraigMac]

We have never heard of all this Yoga/Pilates/Yoghurt/Meusli lifestyle.

I live in Cheshire and its quite posh and ive never heard of all this stuff are you making it up?

Regards

[dean]

i seem to remember touching my toes on numerous occasions back in the late 80s/early 90s. I now content my my self with touching other peoples toes when they let me.

is that posh?

[CraigMac]

Dean,
My wife is a Podiartrist and she doesn't like touching peoples toes!
Have you thought about a career change, you could indulge your fetish and make a few quid to boot!!

Regards

[A Yerbury]

Nice pun on the boot there craig. Is pod latin for toe?

confused.

ps.as a podiatrist has your wife ever been laid siege to by an angry news of the world "reading" mob?

[nik_the_brief]

Since I'm currently on a health kick I invested in a pedometer the other day.

I took it home and configured the contraption then took a walk down to the local shop and back. I eagerly checked out the little digital display on the front of my meter... one-hundred-and-ninety-four!

I had no idea I was living so close to so many kiddy-fiddling bastards. I'll be moving out of the area as soon as possible.

As a concerned, newspaper (but not the Telegraph) reading father I'm delighted that I invested in the contraption. I'll now be improving my fitness by kicking the hell out of the pedophiles in the area before I go.

Yours,

Outraged etc.

[CraigMac]

Alex,
I do believe that Pod is Latin for something like foot....as in Chiropodist.
But I went to a comprehensive and therfore never studied Latin....In fact we never studied much!

My wife has told me that she has some very strange patients though...Men wearing nail polish....I suppose thats all right in the south along with pilates and yoghurt, but up here its just not the "Done thing".

Best foot forward!!....(Sorry, I dont wish to offend any Geoge Best fans)

Regards

[A Yerbury]

Alex,
I do believe that Pod is Latin for something like foot....as in Chiropodist.
But I went to a comprehensive and therfore never studied Latin....In fact we never studied much!

My wife has told me that she has some very strange patients though...Men wearing nail polish....I suppose thats all right in the south along with pilates and yoghurt, but up here its just not the "Done thing".

Best foot forward!!....(Sorry, I dont wish to offend any Geoge Best fans)

Regards

I am offended.
Alex.

[CraigMac]

I know there are a few of you on here who went to grammer schools and might know a bit of latin, so how come para medics and para legals dont jump out of high flying aircraft?

Just a thought.

[nik_the_brief]

I know there are a few of you on here who went to grammer schools and might know a bit of latin, so how come para medics and para legals dont jump out of high flying aircraft?

Just a thought.

Or paraplegics for that matter.

I haven't but my mum has.

[A Yerbury]

Or paraplegics for that matter.

I haven't but my mum has.

maybe they did...once?

just a thought.
Alex.

[jill]

CraigMac, I would have to say that no, it is not acceptable for men of the gentle persuasion to wear nail polish, eat trees and hug kittens down here in the south, generally. It depends on your 'personal poncey' factor.

It also seems to be partly related to how long you spend on the forum when you should really be working...it's OK for me, I can multi-task.

[nik_the_brief]

CraigMac, I would have to say that no, it is not acceptable for men of the gentle persuasion to wear nail polish, eat trees and hug kittens down here in the south, generally. It depends on your 'personal poncey' factor.

It also seems to be partly related to how long you spend on the forum when you should really be working...it's OK for me, I can multi-task.

Hah, acksherly I can do that too.

As I type this I'm simultaneously amending an appeal statement with a Russian speaking client (who is sitting in front of me with his interpreter - thank gawd for those nice flat LCD screens which can't really be read from the side); planning dinner for tonight; having other filthy thoughts which should not be disclosed in polite company (or even here) and chewing gum!

ps - I lied about the gum thing, it's bad for you and an overt sign that you're of common descent.

[A Yerbury]

I realised many years ago that it is in fact better to get people working beneath one, so that's my excuse....being a geezer I can't multi-task, but with 2g of ram my computer can. Hey poetry again! cor blimey, quel ponce.

Alex.
ps.I trust madam had a good days marketing?

[dean]

jill's right, dont clutter up your brain with lots of things to do. I am always careful at this time of day not to think too much, i did it a couple of weeks ago and i forgot how to drive my car or where i lived.

to avoid people reading what i am writing i cover the computer with a blanket, which is draped over my head as well. that way nobody can see me.

shhh, i think i can hear someone coming...

[CraigMac]

By good fortune, I am the Big boss...The head honcho..The big Cheese, so I can do as as I please....to a degree...But I am very good at multi tasking..a bit like Nik, im even on the phone as we speak, dealing with a customer...how clever is that!!

Plus, im drinking a cup of tea as well...and thinking... I even made a cup of tea for the chaps in the workshop...which is a real workshop...not one of those things that Harringay council have....

Regards

[jill]

Well done Nik, that is probably because you didn't have your brain bounced out of your head playing rugby as a youth. (Chewing gum is for those who want to look like a cow. Alternatively it is for lower IQs to help them think, Americans or those with halitosis.)

My marketing day has been rather a washout Alex. I work for a small company and, due to the fact the brainless drone who works for me is only good for making coffee and bullying - I have been testing software today. Three level relational exports from Quark to Access. How much photography have you done today?

CraigMac - a boss who makes tea for the troops? Surely you deserve a medal for that. I bet your workers love you.

[A Yerbury]

23 and some studio tidying (one was a room set the rest cut outs) anyway now I am going to a pub to dazzle the locals with my gay dancing.

[dean]

when you say i make you laugh out loud, are you laughing with me or at me?

it's ok, dont answer that.

well actually, if you are laughing with me, i play rugby and too have a hairy back, and i am also known as psyclops(it's not psycho but i do have a bit of a temper). i am a black belt in no can do but am able to crochet to exacting standards. i also cook a fine roast and whilst i cant put my feet behind my ears i can put other peoples feet behind my ears, this is not as physically demanding but helps to break the ice.

[A Yerbury]

when you say i make you laugh out loud, are you laughing with me or at me?

it's ok, dont answer that.

well actually, if you are laughing with me, i play rugby and too have a hairy back, and i am also known as psyclops(it's not psycho but i do have a bit of a temper). i am a black belt in no can do but am able to crochet to exacting standards. i also cook a fine roast and whilst i cant put my feet behind my ears i can put other peoples feet behind my ears, this is not as physically demanding but helps to break the ice.


Dean, are you one of these "thai brides" one hears so much about these days? I must say your stats are very impressive! good luck in your quest for love and western currency.

Alex.x
ps....and do you have any sisters (sans back hair prefferably, but not essential)

[steviej]

have you be at mothers cooking sherry again Bernard?

Nah dear Alex, 'twas some o' me pappy's mucho cheapo Madeira-eo..........


.......... -:hic:- -:hic:- -:hic:-

[steviej]

heaven forfend that anyone would even contemplate the addition of cow juice to green tea!...
But doesn't the cow juice start out as green stuff...............
................anyway I always use semi-skimmed 'cos it's labelled green for that very reason..................so there!!

On a similar tangent I find that Innocenti smoothie stuff (although extortionately expensive) is delicious. My serving suggestion involves a healthy slosh of Absolut though, gives it a bit of a kick...

Absolut is absolutely abstinence stuff, ignore that Yerbs and get some proper grain liquid. I recommend Stolychniya served straight, after a two hour sitting in the depths of your freezer (the Vodka not you) or just leave outside, whichever is the colder..........................brrrrrrrr

[nik_the_brief]

Absolut is absolutely abstinence stuff, ignore that Yerbs and get some proper grain liquid. I recommend Stolychniya served straight, after a two hour sitting in the depths of your freezer (the Vodka not you) or just leave outside, whichever is the colder..........................brrrrrrrr

I agree with your Stoli comments but think it's a terrible waste to mix it with anything else. That's why I suggested that Absolut is best for mixing with smoothies. For cheapskates however the Innocenti smoothie stuff is so strong tasting that Aldi's own brand of vodka - six and a half quid a bottle would probably suffice.

[nik_the_brief]

Been calling them Innocenti smoothies since I started drinking the stuff only to discover the're not supercharged Italian drinks at all - they're called Innocent (without the i).

Whatever they're called - feckin' delicious anyway

[A Yerbury]

stop being silly Bernard, stoli darling whilst lovely is an strictly ab fab girls drink (freezer thickened or not) ponces drink the Polish buffalo stuff. Putting the I in is a good example of "poncing up" an item. well done Nik! with my looks and my brains we can go far.

Alex(i)

x.

[Lost Again]

I've just heard that song again, Jo Wiley this time. According to her the odds for crimbo number 1 are now 3/1. Odd, its not all that impressive really.

I went through a stage of drinking bottles of Lambrini. Only when you could get 2 for £4 though (1.5L bottles of course). The trick was to get all the lads in the flat together before a night out and everybody down a bottle. Last one finished bought the 1st round. great days.......

P.S. I hold the Lambrini downing record
P.P.S. I'm not proud of that fact
P.P.P.S. I'm wearing khaki shorts, terrible

[A Yerbury]

youth truly is wasted on the young...

[nik_the_brief]

I've just heard that song again, Jo Wiley this time. According to her the odds for crimbo number 1 are now 3/1. Odd, its not all that impressive really.

I went through a stage of drinking bottles of Lambrini. Only when you could get 2 for £4 though (1.5L bottles of course). The trick was to get all the lads in the flat together before a night out and everybody down a bottle. Last one finished bought the 1st round. great days.......

P.S. I hold the Lambrini downing record
P.P.S. I'm not proud of that fact
P.P.P.S. I'm wearing khaki shorts, terrible

Didn't know Jo Whiley could even sing!

Lambrini is, I'm lead to believe, the choice drink of chavettes.

ps - At least the shorts aren't burbury bearing in mind your choice of tipple.

[CraigMac]

Up here in the north, we all drink bitter, which for you people in the south is a form of beer. One of the best is made by a brewery called Joseph Holts and is a bit of an aquired taste, but you soon get used to it.
Wine is generally the drink of ladies, along with Babycham. Although I did notice some men with flowery shirts drinking wine once and oddly enough they all looked a bit like that bloke called Jimmy Somerville and danced like him too!!

Regards

[Lost Again]

I must express, the Lambrini days are far in the past. It was a 1st year at uni thing. Living in halls we found more and more foul ways of getting p*ssed for next to nothing. Happy to say those days are now over. Now it tends to be slightly less evil beverages.

I must also exress that I am most certainly not a chav. I have some sort of dignity and self-restraint for a start, and I hate the little f**kers.

ta ra. off to the shops

[steviej]

....................One of the best is made by a brewery called Joseph Holts and is a bit of an aquired taste, but you soon get used to it.....................
Regards


Good God, a man from my own heart!! Holts is the best in the......well, north really (North of the south pole that is)

[steviej]

I agree with your Stoli comments but think it's a terrible waste to mix it with anything else. That's why I suggested that Absolut is best for mixing with smoothies. For cheapskates however the Innocenti smoothie stuff is so strong tasting that Aldi's own brand of vodka - six and a half quid a bottle would probably suffice.
stop being silly Bernard, stoli darling whilst lovely is an strictly ab fab girls drink (freezer thickened or not) ponces drink the Polish buffalo stuff. Putting the I in is a good example of "poncing up" an item. well done Nik! with my looks and my brains we can go far.

Alex(i)

x.


Yes, I'll have to agree there gentlemen. Stoli; strictly neat, stunningly subtle!! :cool:

[A Yerbury]

I thought Joseph stoltz made penetrating oils and loosening fluids? is this more misinformation? I am a bit confused again.

but thanks anyway, and "cheers" chaps!
Alex Bernard (quite well thank you)

[nik_the_brief]

Yes, I'll have to agree there gentlemen. Stoli; strictly neat, stunningly subtle!! :cool:

And reassuringly expensive - no wait that was that Stella Artois tag that was perhaps the crappest advert line since "You're never alone with a Strand".

Especially as the bloody stuff is cheap as frites over the water in Frogland.

[nik_the_brief]

I thought Joseph stoltz made penetrating oils and loosening fluids? is this more misinformation? I am a bit confused again.

but thanks anyway, and "cheers" chaps!
Alex Bernard (quite well thank you)

I suppose it could be considered a 'loosening fluid' if you interpret the term quite fluidly and loosely.

[steviej]

I suppose it could be considered a 'loosening fluid' if you interpret the term quite fluidly and loosely.


'loosening fluid'?? Most definately!! :D :eek:

[nik_the_brief]

'loosening fluid'?? Most definately!! :D :eek:

Sounds like our local Kentish brewery - Shepherd Neame (known colloquially as "Sh1t and scream" in these here parts because it's an acquired taste and takes a while to acclimatise to digestively.

A great line in adverts though - especially for the Spitfire bitter - "Downed all over Kent - like the Luftwaffe" - "No nazi aftertaste" - "Rear gunners drink lager shandy" etc.

Linky--> http://www.spitfireale.co.uk/spitfire_ale.htm

[CraigMac]

Good God, a man from my own heart!! Holts is the best in the......well, north really (North of the south pole that is)

Stevie,
They serve a wonderful pint of Holts in a lovely Cheshire pub called the **** of Budworth...(if the naughty word thingy cuts in, its like a male chicken)
Its one of those very strange Holts boozers that doesnt have a special room for fighting.
The landlord is an ex Saford lad, who cant believe that he's been given a pub in a rural Cheshire village.

Quite a few bikers in the summer, in fact I saw ZZ top in there or was it the Harley owners group...They all look so much alike!!

Regards

[steviej]

Stevie,
They serve a wonderful pint of Holts in a lovely Cheshire pub called the C0ck of Budworth.
Regards


WOW and I thought there was only 6 Holts' pubs I'd not been in. I'll have to pay a visit!!!!! :p

Do you know the landlords name??

[CraigMac]

Stevie,
His name is Chris and he's a true gent, the food is good as well.
Worth a visit, give us a shout when you are going down there.
Regards Craig.

[A Yerbury]

...what with natty boys independant "do you a deal" merchants, Deans thai brides.com and now craigs PR work for the holts franchise this site is becoming little more than a merchandising exercise! there was a time when I could happily "log on" and learn all about tail chops and peoples ducati worries (help!! I have just bought this from ebay! but before it arrives? what do you guys think? is it any good???!! should I sweat blood worrying about it????)

I am concerned, for the betterment of mankind.

Yours, a bit miffed.

Alex.

[steviej]

Stevie,
His name is Chris and he's a true gent, the food is good as well.
Worth a visit, give us a shout when you are going down there.
Regards Craig.

I'll have to wait for the 'Sun' to come back..................... :cool:

[Nonnie]

calm down "the kids" I just don't like this song?!? it sounds exactly like a very (not new music) tune by half man half biscuit from about oohh..15 years ago? !!
It soooo does not! I know the one you're on about and it sounds nowt like it!

However, my all time favourite lyric was done by those guys. How nice to meet someone finally with the same bizarre musical influences as me. Alex, we should probably be shot.

[A Yerbury]

It soooo does not! I know the one you're on about and it sounds nowt like it!

However, my all time favourite lyric was done by those guys. How nice to meet someone finally with the same bizarre musical influences as me. Alex, we should probably be shot.

we should be shot at dawn with flintlocks, romantic to the end. Must do a bit of dusting as Sellers is up for some hill walking.

[DesmoDog]

Mopy ****e, just in time for the manics at christmas. Although top points for managing to get Nunchaks (whatever) into a song and remember kids, school is cool - ignore the lyrics.

[madhatter]

Well it made No:1, so those (Fathers) of us who liked it were in good company! ;) :D