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slob
23-08-2005, 10:05 AM
...chain letter
>
>Hi All,
>
>See what you think and pass it on if you agree with it.
>
>We are hitting 95p a litre in some areas now, soon we will be faced with
>paying £1 a litre.
>
>****** ********* offered this good idea:
>This makes MUCH MORE SENSE than the "don't buy petrol on a certain day"
>campaign that was going around last April or May 04! The oil companies
>just laughed at that because they knew we wouldn't continue to hurt
>ourselves by refusing to buy petrol. It was more of an inconvenience to
>us than it was a problem for them.
>BUT, whoever thought of this idea, has come up with a plan that can
>really work. Please read it and join in! Now that the oil companies and
>the OPEC nations have conditioned us to think that the cost of a litre
>is CHEAP, we need to take aggressive action to teach them that BUYERS
>control the marketplace not sellers. With the price of petrol going up
>more each day, we consumers need to take action.
>
>The only way we are going to see the price of petrol come down is if we
>hit someone in the pocket by not purchasing their Petrol!
>And we can do that WITHOUT hurting ourselves. Here's the idea:
>
>For the rest of this year, DON'T purchase ANY petrol from the two
>biggest oil companies (which now are one), ESSO and BP. If they are not
>selling any petrol, they will be inclined to reduce their prices. If
>they reduce their prices,the other companies will have to follow suit.>
>But to have an impact, we need to reach literally millions of Esso and
>BP petrol buyers.
>
>It's really simple to do!! Now, don't whimp out on me at this point...
>keep reading and I'll explain how simple it is to reach millions of
>people!! I am sending this note to a lot of people. If each of you send
>it to at least ten more (30 x 10 = 300)... and those 300 send it to at
>least ten more (300 x 10 = 3,000) ... and so on, by the time the message
>reaches the sixth generation of people, we will have reached over THREE
>MILLION consumers! If those three million get excited and pass this on
>to ten friends each, then 30 million people will have been contacted! If
>it goes one level further, you guessed it... .. THREE HUNDRED MILLION
>PEOPLE!!! Again, all You have to do is send this to 10 people.
>That's all. (and not buy at ESSO/BP) How long would all that take? If
>each of us sends this email out to ten more people within one day of
>receipt, all 300 MILLION people could conceivably be contacted within
>the next 8 days!!! I'll bet you didn't think you and I had that much
>potential, did you! Acting together we can make a difference. If this
>makes sense to you, please pass this message on. PLEASE HOLD OUT UNTIL
>THEY LOWER THEIR PRICES TO THE 69p a LITRE RANGE
>It's easy to make this happen. Just forward this email, and buy your
>petrol at Shell, Asda,Tesco, Sainsburys, Morrisons Jet etc. i.e. boycott
>BP and Esso.
>

...any thoughts chaps and chapettes?

Rogerg
23-08-2005, 10:20 AM
A few thoughts:

1. where do all the supermarkets buy their petrol??

2. retail fuel sales account for a very small percentage of BP/Esso's GP. (they make more money from selling pies in their forecourt shops)

3. doesn't most of the cost of a litre of fuel go on tax anyhow?

stef
23-08-2005, 10:37 AM
exactely my points Rog..
but then..
if you do the maths.. out of the 10 people who will receive this chain mail, at least 5 f**kwits who will be convinced it can work. i will do the calculation to show how many people will be infected in 2 days.

Scotty
23-08-2005, 10:52 AM
is the stared out bit 'barry from Shell'

dean
23-08-2005, 10:54 AM
so how about this one?

>At last!! A decent chain letter as opposed to the normal chain
>letters/pyramid schemes. This one costs nothing, and you can only
>win. Simply send this e-mail to 9 of your mates.
>
> INSTRUCTIONS:
> Anaesthetise your wife or girlfriend, put her in a large box,
>(don't forget some ventilation holes), and send it to the person who is at
>the top of your list. Soon, your name will be at the top of the list, and
>you will receive 823,542 women through the post. Statistically, among those

>women
>will be at least:
> 0.5 Miss Worlds
> 2.5 Models
> 463 Wild nymphos
>3,234 Good-looking nymphos
>20,198 Who enjoy multiple orgasms
>40,198 Bi-sexual women.
>In total, that is 64,294 women who are simply hornier, less
>inhibited, and tastier than the grumpy old bag you posted off. And, best of
>all, your original package is guaranteed not to be one of those that come
>back
>to you.
>
> DO NOT BREAK THIS CHAIN LETTER
>One bloke for example who sent the letter to only 5 instead
>of 9 of his friends got his original bird back, still in the old dressing
>gown he sent her off in, with the same old migraine attack, and the
>'accusing expression' on her face. On the same day, the international
>supermodel he'd been living with since he sent off his old girlfriend
>moved out to
>live with his best friend (to whom he had not sent the chain letter).
>While I am sending this letter, the bloke that is in 6th place above
>me has already received 837 women and is lying in hospital suffering
>from exhaustion. Outside his ward are 452 more packages.
>
>YOU MUST BELIEVE THIS E-MAIL
>This is a unique opportunity to achieve a totally satisfying sex life.
>
>No expensive meals out, no lengthy conversations about trivialities
>(that only interest women). No obligations, no grumpy mother-in-laws, and
>no
>unpleasant surprises like marriage or engagement. Do not
>hesitate........send this letter today to 9 of your friends.
>PS - Even when you have no wife or girlfriend, you can send your
>hoover
>PPS - This letter can also be copied to women you know so that they
>can prepare themselves for the great adventure that they may soon
>undertake.
>


makes more sense to me, and it is clearly more feasbile.

McMONSTRO
23-08-2005, 12:35 PM
Which half of Miss World do you get? :D :D

Fosse Foxfight
23-08-2005, 02:38 PM
[QUOTE=dean]so how about this one?

>At last!! A decent chain letter as opposed to the normal chain
>letters/pyramid schemes. This one costs nothing, and you can only
>win. Simply send this e-mail to 9 of your mates.
>
> INSTRUCTIONS:
> Anaesthetise your wife or girlfriend, put her in a large box,
>(don't forget some ventilation holes), and send it to the person who is at
>the top of your list. Soon, your name will be at the top of the list, and
>you will receive 823,542 women through the post. Statistically, among those

OK Dean my wife is on the way to you.

dean
23-08-2005, 02:48 PM
[QUOTE=dean]OK Dean my wife is on the way to you.

Excellent, and by the way, considering the huge logistical challenge of the wife chain exercise, we should all make sure we boycott Esso and BP while we're at it.

right, who wants my missus.



Hello?



Anybody!!?

CraigMac
23-08-2005, 03:04 PM
Fosse and Dean.....(Sounds a bit like that cinema advertising firm)

There are certain sites that cater for your wife swapping activities.......

Disgusted of Cheshire.

Fosse Foxfight
23-08-2005, 03:19 PM
Fosse and Dean.....(Sounds a bit like that cinema advertising firm)

There are certain sites that cater for your wife swapping activities.......

Disgusted of Cheshire.
I dont want anybodies wife :( just some woman free time thanks...please?

dean
23-08-2005, 04:03 PM
I dont want anybodies wife :( just some woman free time thanks...please?

Nope, no matter how many times i read that i am still struggling to make a sentence out of it.Which is absolutely fine by the way, just thought i'd mention it.

CraigMac
23-08-2005, 04:58 PM
Dean,
Its some kind of wife swapping code, meaning "lets meet in Sheffield and have a good time"

Or am I reading to much into it....

A Yerbury
23-08-2005, 05:10 PM
I think he has one of these "speech impediments" or "****sloxia" that so many thick people hide behind, the message should read "I want any wife THREE times"

please thanks and hello.
Alex.

SAMMYE
23-08-2005, 05:14 PM
aer you srue he deosnt maen "free" as in not hviang to pay??

A Yerbury
23-08-2005, 05:17 PM
quite possibly, I almost posted the same but on reflection it was not amusing enough.

AY.x