Didge have you been moonlighting again?

[Rogerg]

..........................

[Didge]

Moonlighting???? Do you not mean moonsh*teing?
I was indeed. They were testing the bonding capabilities of some of my more claggy 'products' on concrete slabs.
Unfortunately, the workers were overcome with the fumes, and then had to be fitted with full chemical suits and respirators. Also after the bonded concrete slabs had fully hardened, it was found that they were beginning to decay rather rapidly, so the testing was abandoned.
A shame really, because I am commited to recycling waste products.

[gary tompkins]

I think we needed a few warning signs like that at the weekend. It might have helped prevent the 'friendly fire' incident in the bar on Sunday evening :lol:

[Lost Again]

it's bad enough to launch at your own people but to fire upon innocent civilians is a little harsh. I think the only way they could have moved away quicker is if they'd broken into a full on sprint. Saying that, i think the little girl with tears streaming down her face tried to but couldn't see where she was going. She's going to have mental scarring for years to come.

[Didge]

Ah yes, the ‘friendly fire incident’. I’d of preferred it if you chaps had kept that quiet.
It is an unfortunate event that occurs from time to time in my profession, and I must admit that it was a little unprofessional of me to allow it to happen.
I had spent time reconning the bar. On seeing no innocents around, I then proceeded to home in on my targets at the far end. When I had reached the target area, I should have checked once more for civilians, but so intent was I, on dropping my load, I failed to notice a change in wind direction and also that a group of innocents had entered the bar at the other end.
I then released my weapon of choice, a rather softly audible but violently lethal hydrogen-sulphate/methane mix. After waiting the obligatory 8 to 10 seconds, I slowly turned around to extract myself from the target area.
It was only then, that I saw the group of innocents, including children, and at the same time, realised that the ‘fall-out’ was travelling away from the target area and along the bar towards the civilians.
I then sped up my retreat, but the speed of the fall-out was such, that it hit the civilians only a few seconds after I passed them.
I could only look on helplessly, as they all succumbed to the poison that enveloped them and they staggered from the bar area, throwing me accusing looks through tear streamed eyes.
One always has to live with the fact, that on occasion, a certain amount of collateral damage will occur.
I hope that they are able to leave the hospital fairly soon, and that they make a full recovery. In my defence, I would like to point out, that the chosen weapon was fairly weak in comparison to the ones that I released in the car park area. Those were special ‘out-doors’ weapons, that are made to cover a large area, even in a brisk breeze, and they proved VERY successful, as I was hitting a dozen or more targets at once. Despite the loud explosion they emitted, the brisk breeze ensured that the targets were hit and neutralised, long before they could make their escape.
This I think, more than makes up for the collateral damage in the bar area.

[MilesB]

I think we needed a few warning signs like that at the weekend. It might have helped prevent the 'friendly fire' incident in the bar on Sunday evening :lol:

Friendly fire is deffinitely not the right word - Unfriendly maybe :rolleyes: .

I think the phrase you are struggling towards - eyes and nostrils clenched tightly shut - was MASSIVE COLLATERAL DAMAGE ;)

Speaking as probably the primary target in this incident, I can honestly report that the effects of the Pungent Effulgent at Ground Zero were quite horriffic :eek: :eek:
The expression on my face - which Jan will remember to her dying days - was one of 'shock and awe', and a response to my olfactory system going into terminal shutdown. In addition my eyes began to water and my ear wax to melt and trickle on to my shoulders. :(

Contrary to Didges report, there was no audible warning of the attack - possibly making this a War Crime under the terms of the Geneva Convention :twisted:

As to the poor inocent bystanders affected, I believe reparations may be in order... the UN have been summoned :o

[scrumpster]

I need a new set of ribs and cheeks please :lol:

[gary tompkins]

I think Didge might be needing a new set of (arse) cheeks pretty soon. Especially if he decides to dabble in 'Extreme Pot Noodling' before his tattered ring has had a chance to recuperate :twisted:

[SazzaG]

I was sitting here reading this post, having just arrived in Vancouver, when there eminated from outside what can only be described as the biggest fart noise I have ever heard!

For a moment, I thought Didge had decided to join me here, then I realised it was a cruise ship signalling that it was about to leave. Thank god for that, at least it means the noise wasn't accompanied by a smell...

Saz

[Didge]

Speaking as probably the primary target in this incident, I can honestly report that the effects of the Pungent Effulgent at Ground Zero were quite horriffic :eek: :eek:
Yes Miles, I admit that you were the primary target for that attack, but you were surrounded by a few secondarys as well, so I thought it was too good and opportunity to miss. 'Taking out' as many as possible in one pass, is of course good military stratagy.

Contrary to Didges report, there was no audible warning of the attack - possibly making this a War Crime under the terms of the Geneva Convention :twisted:
As to the poor inocent bystanders affected, I believe reparations may be in order... the UN have been summoned :o
There was indeed an audible report when the chosen weapon was released, but it was a 'semi-stealth' version, and the sound of the propellant exploding was lost in the surrounding ambient noise. Seeing as you were all UKMOC members, I tried to give fair warning, and looking back, I should have used a non-stealth maximum report propellant, but I am after all, only human. Well, part of me is at least.
I once appeared before a UN Committee Of Enquiry, 10 seconds later, it no longer existed.
The UN then decided that there is little, if anything that they can do, as the weaponary is entirely 'natural', and therefore exists outside of all military law.
I was put in the same natural catagory as the skunk (thus the avatar, which they insisted upon), and they decided that the world just has to live (and die) with my kind.